Photo Challenge #86 November 10, 2015 – Maryann

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

image by Valentina Kallias ~ “Apocalypse Horseman Pestilence”

 

Maryann was a jokester

She lived the other side of the black stump.

She spent half her days on a combine harvester

The other on a stump jump plough.

The farm was her life

Morning till night was tilling one day

Harvesting the next.

Her dad decided on her twenty-first birthday

It was time she saw the world.

He gave her a ticket to go and see

The big city at the end of the line.

She landed there and was all amazed

So many people and so much noise.

There was no shortage of callow-faced youth

Nor of the rich up themselves haughty.

She was invited to the Toff and Tie Ball

Dressed in her finest, combed her hair.

All went well until she opened her mouth.

Out spewed her country vernacular

A combination of bloody, struth,

Bugger me britches and workin’ me tits off

Didn’t go so well with the refined young men

Who turned away, scoffed and remarked

How quaint this girl from the country was.

Maryann the jokester

Went home to practice her vowels

Learn a little social etiquette.

She practiced every day when on the tractor

Rounding her mouth as she enunciated “I say.”

But there was no hiding from who she was

When one day in town she met her true prince

No frog in waiting but a man of true blood

Who looked at her and saw the girl who was there.

‘Be who you are,’ he said softly to her

‘Bloody oath I will.’ Said Maryann with relief.

For Maryann realised it was who she was

That endeared her to her one true love.

Maryann was a jokester, that’s who she was.

 

Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2015/11/10/photo-challenge-86/

Posted in Poetry, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , , , | 24 Comments

Bonus Wordle “November 9, 2015” – The Teekva Soup

bonus-wordle

This week’s bonus words:

  1. Cagestruck (via Yves) to be clueless of the customs, dialect/language/slang, and haunts of an unfamiliar city.
  2. Ardle (via Michael) a person who urinates whenever and wherever the mood strikes them.
  3. Shiprighteous (via KO) A smugly moralistic ship.
  4. Figimaled (via Jules) Primarily Farklempt; distressed, confused, annoyed, dismayed.
  5. Aarambham (via Two Paise Poems) Indian for the beginning.
  6. Avasaanam (via Two Paise Poems) Indian for the end.
  7. Punarjanmam (via Two Paise Poems) Indian for rebirth or reincarnation.
  8. Teekva (via a darkened house) Russian for a pumpkin.
  9. Skuddling (via a darkened house) side-ways, skitterish motion
  10. Maganda (via Ladyleemanila) Filipino word for beauty, refers to the beauty of both form and spirit.
  11. Sayang (via Hank) Malay/Indonesian word referring to a loved one. Also used to express one’s affectionate feelings to a lady – whispered softly while nibbling the ear lobe.
  12. Appraisal (via Ranted Crow); The act or result of judging the worth or value of something or someone.

What started out as a holiday to remember ended up a holiday that was far more interesting than anyone ever imagined.

Mr. Bristow had decided that in the interests of his family and their education he would take them on an overseas holiday. Jimmy with his ardling affliction was to go as well and the family had grown used to their son’s peculiarities and so didn’t think twice about packing for Jimmy.

Mr. Bristow decided that they would go on a cruise to begin with and booked passage on the Star of India, a floating skyscraper as a way of beginning the holiday.

Now the ship they chose unbeknownst to Mr. Bristow was the most shiprighteous ship around and trouble started at the dock when Jimmy was observed emptying his bladder onto the side of the ship. There was a real sense of the cagestruck about the Bristow’s who were so used to Jimmy’s eccentricities they had long ceased being aware of social mores.

The Indian ship’s captain decided that the family needed a new beginning and as they boarded the ship he performed an aarambham ceremony used in such circumstances when a new beginning was being called for.

The Bristow’s were impressed that they were being afforded such a personalized welcome. Mrs. Bristow somewhat figimaled by the mornings events stood back and kept her fingers crossed as she knew this was only the start of the holiday and Jimmy, she knew, was just warming up to this holiday idea. At least she thought if he gets the urge on the ship he’ll do it over the side and inconvenience very few. But within hours Jimmy was in trouble once again this time ardling over the starboard side when the prevailing wind was blowing against the starboard side and the first class passengers in the private rooms copped a good spray.

As a result a lot of scuddling happened among the Bristow’s and pretending nothing had happened. All the family went into a figimale of their own only to be greeted that night by the ships captain who informed them that an appraisal of their presence had been done and their avasaanam had arrived sooner than they had hoped and that he expected in some new life Jimmy would undergo a punarjanmam and so begin a new and more productive life.

Their final meal was a delicious teekva soup made specially by the ships chef for the first night of the voyage, though in the Bristow’s case it was more a last supper.

The teekva soup had interesting effects on those who ate it and the Bristow’s feeling downcast at the news they were about to be ejected from the cruise fell under the soups spell and before long oblivious to all around them Mr and Mrs Bristow were engaged in a furious bout of sayang forgoing all decency at one stage as Mr Bristow found himself and his good wife in the clutches of amorousness they had not felt in many years.

Jimmy felt the teekva soup having strange effect on him as well. His ardling urge diminished, he asked if there was a toilet nearby, this announced brought the dining room to instant silence.

The ships captain feeling a moment of magenda had arrived called for an instant toast to Jimmy’s recovery…..all the dining room rose and toasted the new found punarjanmam occurring before their eyes.

Mr Bristow was by now moving onto Mrs Bristow’s left ear lobe, she was feeling more than she’d had in more years than she felt like remembering. Under the table they sayanged away at each other unaware that life above the table had changed forever.

Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2015/11/09/bonus-wordle-november-9-2015/

Posted in wordle, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , | 33 Comments

SoCS Nov. 7/15 – ‘cat’

socs-badge-2015

This week’s prompt word: “cat” in any shape or form…

It was a catastrophe of catastrophic proportions.

I looked at her and she at me and we both burst into laughter.

On the floor was her prize and joy.

Though on the floor it didn’t look the attractive dish it did before it hit.

She’d spent all afternoon preparing the pumpkin pie from a recipe her mum had used some twenty years before. Every step of the way was greeted with the excitement of her voice saying, “There that’s right, I remember mum saying it had to look that way.”

But right now the pie was no more. Not only was it on the floor and spreading into the floorboards but it also was turning a colour neither of us expected. Where it should have been a pumpkin colour there was a hint of red about the mix as it oozed from the smashed pie dish.

My wife is a great pie lover and loves to quote a list of her favourite pies, which takes in most known varieties. Today was a special one for not only was it using her mum’s recipe but also her dad was coming from the nursing home for lunch on one of his rare days out. Clarrie was a great pie lover, after any meal when asked if he wanted dessert he’d say: “Better have something to take the taste away.”

Catastrophes aside we were in trouble. The red tinge to the smashed pie grew larger, we looked from one to the other and realised that my wife’s hand was bleeding, her precious blood spilling all over the now ruined pie and suddenly the dilemma grew larger, fix the floor, or fix the hand.

Floors don’t scream like a person with a bleeding hand will and so that catastrophe solved I rushed around to get a cloth to help stem the flow of blood.

Hours later her hand swathed in bandages we returned home to find her dad in the kitchen surveying what was left of the pie, now a mash of pumpkin and glass.

‘Been a bit of a catastrophe here I see,’ he said as we entered, a take away Chinese meal under my arm…. a frozen apple pie to be placed into the oven…

Written for: http://lindaghill.com/2015/11/06/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-nov-715/

Posted in SOC, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , | 18 Comments

Music Friday Prompt #15 “Daughter” by Loudon Wainwright – Three Daughters

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VkI-07rzEnA

First one born into a world that was so certain

Where I thought this baby thing would be easy

But you didn’t read the memo

You led me up a path of discovery

Wonder and at times utter frustration

As I walked the floor instead of sleeping

Curious how someone so little

Would not sleep when I was so dog-tired.

Then another, I thought I have a handle on this

Babies cry, its what they do

But you didn’t, you were so good

Lying in my arms upon your birth

Looking into my eyes, awakening to me

We have since been connected.

A curly headed kid, who suffered more than you should

And yet grew into a swan.

And a third, the littlest, most fragile

A personality all your own, nestled into a growing family

Fussed over by siblings, we thought you lacking

We joked, as you didn’t flourish as you might

That there’d be one not as the others.

We discovered you couldn’t see

Realised what aware parents we weren’t

Glasses allowed you to prosper in a new world.

Three daughters each an individual

Grown into women of merit and worth

Each knows her place in the world

I am so proud to see them achieve potential.

Their children tiny reflections of them

Personality and character traits passed on,

Love and compassion, connection to each other

Never have we failed each other.

Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2015/11/06/music-friday-prompt-15-daughter-by-loudon-wainwright-plus-a-bonus-song/

Posted in Poetry, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Tale Weaver #38: Tales Twice Told – Watching the Arrivals

converse_chuck_taylor_all_star_x-hi_pink_canvas_shoes

You see them all at the train station every morning. From 5.30 through 8.30 they come and go hurrying quickly into the city.

The weird and wacky, the sad and the happy, the focused and the dreamers, the lovers and the dumped, the sleepless and the sleepy.

They parade through the barriers in front of me and I watch to make sure that my regulars are there, the ones whom I’m gotten to know on the 5.45am from Katoomba, the 6.21 from Cronulla, the 6.05 from Maitland. It’s a non-stop procession of legs, feet and faces and I’ve gotten to know so many of them.

Not by name of course, I doubt any of them have ever noticed me as I sit with my belongings outside the coffee shop watching them go about their business, far to busy to stop and wonder about the scruffy man in the old coat with his trolley and belongings spread around him.

Some of them are in earnest conversation, the same chat I’ve heard every morning…office gossip I call it, the one with the blue hair constantly whinging about the other women in the office, the lecherous supervisor who’ll look favourably at you if you slip him a glimpse of your thigh, the tea lady having a very obvious affair with the head cleaner and the office CEO who has a new secretary every few months as he tires of them so quickly.

The myriad of school students who chatter like the birds in the trees in the park, there banter barely decipherable, their language sprinkled with obscenity.

There’s the couple who sit near and every morning enjoy a coffee before heading in opposite directions to the same workplace. He wants her to leave her husband, she fears for her life if she dares, they meet on weekends when she fakes work commitments and they spend time together doing what young lovers do.

The one who interests him is the lady with the grey bangs who comes into the coffee shop with her dog. She buys the same beveridge in a takeaway cup and stands near the arrivals barrier and watches, much like I do, as if she too is waiting for some one.

Her dog she feeds small treats as she stands and waits and the dog sits silently beside her. The occasional child approaches but she warns them off says the dog is working and not to disturb him. But they have been coming here for so long now its plain the job, whatever it is, is far from completed.

She sips her coffee, eyes focused on the arrival gate; she scans the faces coming at her but never registers any recognition.

It’s always a sixty-five minute wait. Then she gathers her dog’s lead and wanders off through the south entrance.

I once heard her say to the dog as she wandered by, “We’ll try again tomorrow.’ She’s had a lot of tomorrows as far as I can see and the person she’s expecting I wonder what has happened to him or her.

I once tried to engage her in conversation but she looked at me in horror and walked quickly away. So now we notice one another and I keep my distance.

I find that is the best way to be, at a distance, safe that way, people so easily get the wrong idea, appearance creates opinions and my appearance doesn’t do much to generate anything other than a need to stay well clear.

I worry when I don’t see a regular. I hope that tomorrow I’ll see them, that it’s a day off they are having, a minor illness but there have been a lot over the years who have vanished, here one day not the next.

I know my day will come too and I doubt anyone will notice other than there will be an extra seat and table outside the coffee shop.

Now I need to concentrate, the 7.23 from Gosford is due in and the ladies who work at the Credit Union were talking of getting new hairdos over night and I’m keen to see the results.

Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2015/11/05/tale-weaver-38-tales-twice-told/

Posted in prose, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , , | 14 Comments

FFfAW-Week of 11-03-2015 – Jason

wpid-photo-20151102113729944

My teacher was right, this is hell.

She didn’t say anything about this dimension though.

I get up to heaven and God says Jason you’ve been a bad boy.

I say God I just got wiped out in a car accident.

God says Jason you have to be penitent to get into heaven.

I say what does that mean.

He says be sorry for the life you led the pain you inflicted.

I’m dead God I say give me a break.

It’s written down here says God checking his book. Lying cheating, shagging, hagging and fagging, swindling, thieving and deceiving…..and list went on.

So he says you have to learn some humility and do your penance.

So here I am ironically inside an angel statue, the very thing in life I wasn’t.

I’ve tried to get out but this place is slam bam shut.

The pigeons hate me; I think they are guided to shit in my eye every day.

Bugger here comes another one…..ugh….bastard…

Written for: https://flashfictionforaspiringwriters.wordpress.com/2015/11/03/fffaw-week-of-11-03-2015/

Posted in FFFAW, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , | 44 Comments

Photo Challenge #85 November 3, 2015 – Illusion

1702-1253571541qfva

Image: “Decompose” by zaldy icaonapo

At first you were beautiful

No words to describe how I felt

Your beauty shone through.

All the right words were spoken

Promises made, vows exchanged.

But it turned to an illusion

Your beauty faded

Your light extinguished

By constant disagreement

Love lost

Trust eroded

Vanished hope.

I watched you moving further away

Until you were untouchable

Anger, aggression and angst

Where once there was

Love, commitment and desire.

I saw you today in the street

A woman bent over, studying the pavement

Still ignorant of all around you

Grumbling to yourself

As you are the only one left

Who listens to you.

Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2015/11/03/photo-challenge-85/

Posted in Poetry, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , , | 8 Comments

Haibun Monday – 3 – Spring Wedding

view-of-the-church-of-saint-paul-de-mausole-1889

Image: View of the church of Saint Paul de Mausole by Vincent van Gogh

We are standing across the field from the church the one we plan for our wedding.

Spring has arrived and last and allowed this opportunity to travel back to the village I was brought up in. It’s been so long and it was at your insistence that we made this journey.

You called a romantic notion to have our wedding in this historic church who through the years has seen couples from all walks of life venture down the aisle to the alter make their vows and celebrate their nuptials in the grounds of the church under the great oak its sweeping branches giving its blessing to every union.

I feel your hand slip into mine, you whisper softly that you are ready and we make our way across the field our excitement increasing with each step.

spring blossoms

lure us into our future

stepping back in time.

Written for: http://dversepoets.com/2015/11/02/haibun-monday-3/

Posted in d'verse, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , | 52 Comments

Mondays Finish the Story – Nov. 2nd. 2015 – Coins

2015-11-02-c2a9-2015-barbara-w-beacham

Finish the story begins with:   “She lived a life that some would describe as being on edge.”

It all had to do with money and the fact that she didn’t have any. Her next meal was always an issue.

The welfare was her saviour. The various organisations around the town provided breakfast dinner and tea but none ever came forward with any permanent residence.

She kept her lucky coins in a small cloth bag tied to her waist and knew that if she ever got totally desperate they would help get her at least a feed.

Living under the bridge at the edge of town didn’t do much for her self esteem. She tried to keep herself clean but washing and cleaning came with the age old problem of cost.

In a winter that was colder than any could remember they found her under the bridge frozen to death.

In the brief investigation into her death there was much speculation as to how she came to possess two coins worth millions.

 

Written for: https://mondaysfinishthestory.wordpress.com/2015/11/02/mondays-finish-the-story-nov-2nd-2015/

Posted in MFTS, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , | 40 Comments

Wordle #85 “November 2, 2015” – Ardling

week-85

This week’s words: Water Submersible Kelp Migration Plexus (a network, as of nerves or blood vessels. any complex structure containing an intricate network of parts:

the plexus of international relations.) Ungainly Nonchalant Mutilate Nickel Melanin (any of a class of insoluble pigments, found in all forms of animal life,that account for the dark color of skin, hair, fur, scales, feathers, etc. I for one have very little and therefore cannot tan despite sun exposure.) Phase, The last word I want you to invent (give a definition in the beginning). If you are fluent in a language other than English you can alternatively teach us a special word in that language. These words will be gathered up for future use ,-).

I went to school with a kid called James ‘Jimmy ‘ Briscow. Jimmy was a tall and ungainly kid and an ardler to boot.

Everyone knew he was an ardler and no one ever wanted to sit next to him in class.

The teachers had all told us about Jimmy when he came to the school and that we had to be patient and hope that it was a phase he was going through.

But he never passed through it in the time I knew him and what was doubly worrying was the nonchalant way in which he practiced his ardling.

It was as if he didn’t notice what he was doing. One minute he could be telling you about his family migrating to Australia from Scotland and the next minute he’s be doing it, right in front of you didn’t matter if the girls were about he didn’t ever seem to notice if anyone was watching.

Of course the other odd thing about Jimmy was his albinism as his body was missing melanin that gave the rest of us a skin colour that suited the Australian summer. Jimmy had to wear a hat outside and smear sunscreen on his face before going out to play at lunchtime.

Of course the bullies had a field day with him taunting him all day telling him to ardle away and laughing when he did.

In term 3 of year 5 we were to go on an excursion to the naval depot to study the port and the workings of the depot. Jimmy nearly didn’t make it as the afternoon before some of the boys frightened that Jimmy would embarrass them dealt him a blow in the solar plexus that left him lying on the ground in pain. The boys ran off thinking they had done the necessary deed to stop Jimmy coming.

But Jimmy was used to being picked on and had known his fair share of beatings and attempts to mutilate him as he grew up. He wanted to go on the trip and so made his way home and didn’t tell his parents of the pain he was in for fear of them saying he couldn’t go.

The next morning he turned up at school with a shiny nickel in his pocket, excursion form signed and his hat in place.

His attackers were stunned to see him turn up and vowed that if Jimmy started to ardle they’d act all in the good name of themselves and the school.

At the naval depot there was a lot of water and the boys eyed it as a place to bump Jimmy into should he give them cause. The water around the depot was dirty and thick with kelp and the most unpleasant place anyone would want to be.

We were all invited to inspect a navy submersible and everyone was keen to go down into the vessel.

All was going well until we heard that tell tale sound of Jimmy ardling. Every kid froze not sure where to look as Jimmy nonchalantly ardled against the Captains door. Our teacher was horrified and when confronted by the naval tour director had to admit that Jimmy was an ardler, a person who when the urge took him pulled out his penis and urinated there and then.

We were all ushered off the submersible and politely given a dishonourable discharge from the excursion.

Jimmy was always nonplussed about his role in what happened as ardling was such a part of him he ardled as the easiest way to solve his bladder problem.

Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2015/11/02/wordle-85-november-2-2015/

Posted in wordle, writing challenge | Tagged , , , , , | 16 Comments