Both morbid and beautiful at once, this incantatory word means “You bury me,” a declaration of one’s hope that they’ll die before another person because of how difficult it would be to live without them.
I stand looking at what’s left
A stone to mark a glorious life
A record of years well spent.
My mind floods with thoughts
The meetings, the verbal courtship
The wooing, the coyness, the expectation.
We made commitments, promises
Dreams materialised, manifested
Our lives took on new exciting twists.
How am I to wake each morning?
How am I to sleep not holding you?
How am I to live, survive, function now?
The emptiness is permanent,
It rips me knowing as I do
It’s every day for eternity.
I eat but, nothings tastes anymore
Everything we treasured is lost
Our bed a barren wasteland.
I miss the intimacy of us
The closing of each day
The waking of our mornings.
I stare into memory now finalised
You are here, without you what am I?
I am wandering, aimless in everyway.
My days I will spend with you
I will chat as we did daily
One-way conversation, awaiting reply.
Today I come, tea in hand
To sit as once we did in morning sun
All that remains is past routine.