I am driven to distraction
By promises made
Which impact on
My own perverse sense of expectation.
People who say one thing and do the opposite.
Its soul destroying when you believe something
Only to realise that it’s nothing more than words.
Maybe I read too much into what a person says
But when they say they’ll be there at a certain time,
They will soon write to you
They will send you the information you need
And nothing ever arrives,
There is no one to meet.
You are left standing around the meeting place
Looking like a shag on a rock
The only one at the party.
You begin to wonder what point there is
To believing anything anyone says.
When I am told something that I deem
Is good and happening
I go into a state of expectation.
They are going to be here at seven
The letter will arrive any day
They said they would call
So I get into a state
I pace the floor
I tap my foot
I go the letterbox fifty times a day
I irritate everyone around me
With the same dumb questions
Day in and day out.
I ring and get no answers
Everyone acts innocent.
What? We did? When?
While I am tearing out my hair,
(What is left of it)
In sheer frustration
Annoyed
Feeling foolish, again
Thinking the world is having this
Huge joke at my expense
That elsewhere someone is watching
Delighting in my impatience
My frustration
My anger that spills over
Leaving all around me on knife-edge.
I feel shackled to my own naked self
Restrained, incapable of breaking free.
Written for: http://mindlovemisery.wordpress.com/2014/02/02/day-41-consuming-impatience/
Morpethroad 
Waiting patiently for things to happen..yet few times there is no delays
But most often..we wait to meet and see the people who promised
Unfortunately..we just wait..endlessly 🙂
Well…time not to take them so seriously..I guess 🙂
Yes that is how you have to see it when people let you down. Thank you so much for your comment, please call again.
🙂
Oh dear – I know what you mean. I’m so impatient. And – if I say I’m going to do something I follow through as best as I can. When others don’t – it frustrates the heck out of me. Am I expecting too much?
No not at all, we have something in common there RoSy. Thanks for reading my post. Have. Good evening as you are up late?
You’re welcome.
Yes – 1am here.
Gonna’ post something quick & then hit the hay.
Nighty-night for me & happy day to you. 🙂
Ugh I know this agony Michael I am the same way. The mail is especially bad because my packages letters are always months and sometimes even years delayed (seriously). I used to look forward to it I’d order something online it would say 2 weeks but then 7.5 months later it would arrive looking as if it had been beaten with a baseball bat. Without fail the mail has disappointed me so many times I no longer believe it will arrive. Sam can order and it will arrive ahead of schedule! He orders everything now but if he orders for me it is always late just not as late as if I had been involved in the process. If I chose the item guaranteed it would spontaneously no longer be available but they won’t tell me that until I have waited a few months first. I have some weird curse Sam thought I was exaggerating when we first met but after 14 years he can no longer dispute it lol I am currently having a problem making doctor’s appointments they keep forgetting me no matter how much I badger. I hate waiting especially when you really expect believe.
I am heartened to hear that mail may arrive seven months after it was sent as that happened to me with mail not arriving, so I can still live in hope. It is very heartening when a piece strikes a chord with my favourite reader ( suck up I know). We often feel we are capable of being possessed by a curse of some kind. I always believed my hands on a lottery ticket meant no chance of a win. And I have been proved right every week!!! Thanks for the top comment Yves.
I never win in lotteries either Michael I think my luck goes into keeping my clumsy self intact and I can’t fault that lol Mail can come surprisingly late but it may not be in good condition When we moved from the States to Sweden we packed extremely carefully but it looked like they’d run over the boxes with forklifts we lost some precious items.
Well having read your comment I will live in hope. Then again we do have other qualities that make people notice us. Good looks, brains, genial personalities, great dress sense, I could go on…..but it would bore all and everyone who reads,we know our strengths, don’t we?
lol
I really do hope your package arrives
So now will the sender..lol
It Better!!!!!! But I hold out no hope 😉 Ok I chuckled at shag on a rock, the only one at the party, then tearing your hair out what’s left of it! You are such a dag. I think many of us are impatient little buggas, I know I am too. I don’t care much about the mail, but grr if visitors arrive late – a pet hate of mine. Really liked this and you did well for Yves prompt. I shall have to now try…oh Muse…where are you?
Thank you Jenny, I appreciate your kind and insightful comment. Good I could give you a laugh.
sorry wasn’t that kind and insightful I know – but I did smile and that is equally as good…isn’t it?
Coming from you, yes!
good 🙂
I’ve found that living in India is an exercise in patience. Times here approximate. Someone is coming to fix something in your home and either doesn’t show up or comes whenever they please. My husband who’s Indian jokingly calls it Indian Time. Packages might not make it at all. I’m pleased when I “do” receive the expected package, especially when it hasn’t been torn at one end.
I think most of life is an exercise in patience and we get it tested daily in all sorts of ways. ‘Indian time’ sounds like the way folk treat time in the bush of Australia. No hurry, it will get done, why rush when there is tomorrow after all. Thanks for that great comment Patricia.
It is funny….I don’t let things get to me that I have no control over such as a package. Stressing will do what? Any impatient issues I have lie within myself. Mail…eh, not so much. But a las, it seems you have something in common with your favorite reader…maybe Sweden and Australia like to mess around with you?
Thank you Anja, her point about mail taking months gave me hope. As unfounded as it might be I like the idea that hope brings me.
Glad she gave you hope.
Ah! I know that feeling so well – brilliantly described!! 🙂 🙂
Thank you so much Helen.
I could feel your impatience growing into frustration and then anger and ouch hair pulling too!! Well written. I would agree with dear wise Kalabalu…it is sometimes best NOT to have expectations of some people who are always late…mail orders are somewhat difficult to control however and trying to trace a parcel only adds to frustrations (sigh)
Thanks Oliana, I once lived with a person who was habitually late, it drove me crazy. If something started a seven she thought that was when you left home even if an hours drive was needed. Eventually I started to say whatever began at seven started at six and even then she was struggling to be ready to leave. The mail order is a reference to letters a very good friend sent me last year and never arrived, I saw a glimmer of hope. Hope you are well today.
I took the day off so I could volunteer tonight and be rested, facilitating a support group. I am always late…ooops…my ex would wait until I was ready, make up on, hair perfectly coiffed…then he would shower and dress…he found a way to NOT get annoyed…lol Maybe that is why we managed to stay together 28 years…lol. My daughter is like her dad…always on time, my son is like me…fashionably late:)
Yes well there is late and there is fashionably late. I have one other category, rudely late! That’s the day you know a cruise is leaving at 5.30 and you arrive at 6.45 and everyone has been waiting for you. It’s a beautiful day down here in paradise. Did you get a chance to read my email? I am off to meet a mate this morning.
Oh dear, I did not check my email..will check it now and give you another address that pops into my smart phone regularly.
Waiting for the irresponsible is frustrating for one that is a stickler for time.
Thanks Kim I agree completely. Hope you are well today.
Yes too it easy over the weekend. Hope all is good with you.
I am doing well. Thanks again.