This week’s words: Insulin Posture Shake Suffer Cloudburst Immure (v.)) to enclose within walls. to shut in; seclude or confine. to imprison. to build into or entomb in a wall. obsolete. to surround with walls; fortify.) Hereafter Slovenly Radiate Gladiola Restaurant Galimatias (n)) Nonsense (A secret that must be kept on pain of death.)
When you reached the hereafter, there were only two considerations. You caught the lift up, or you took the lift down.
The lift down meant an eternity of fine restaurants, great food, the finest sushi and public bathhouses.
The lift up meant eternal hymn singing, a decent ham sandwich on every street corner and endless choir rehearsal.
This was eternity where everyone was catered for in one form or another.
The thought of downstairs as being a world of suffering was a long-held myth. Sure, you could be given a decent shake up, your slovenly ways made plain to you that they would not be tolerated and you’d better shape up, or you’d be shipped out. Tolerance wasn’t a virtue espoused in the downstairs department. You wanted tolerance you took the lift up.
It was during a cloudburst of biblical proportions that Ronny Scarp came face to face with his eternity. He became stranded, suffered a major diabetic attack as his insulin levels peaked or didn’t peak whichever way you wanted to think about it. Either way, Ronny found himself staring into his eternity unsure as to whether or not he was an upstairs or downstairs man.
The beauty of the hereafter is that you are immured from the constraints of the earthly life, in the hereafter you can radiate your own kind of goodness, tolerance or indifference safe in the knowledge that a good immurement ensures you of a hereafter that could possibly be just yours.
It surprised most people that Ronny should die such an inglorious death. For in the next life Ronny was able to exercise his galimatias, his secret love of cooking and found in Hell’s Restaurant just the place to practice his culinary skills.
Not only was a closeted chef he also harboured a passion to be a florist and so he soon had the restaurant adorned with the finest gladiola he could find.
Hell’s Restaurant was a changed place under Ronny Scarp’s direction.
But one thing he did insist on was his restaurant staff carry themselves with as correct posture as they could manage. After all, Ronny argued a meal delivered by a well-postured waiter made the meal all that more palatable.