As evening approaches and begins to take hold of the ending day I am drawn to the water’s edge.
It is low tide and even though, if I want to, I can walk out a long way, I don’t want to as I dislike the smell of rotting sea vegetation permeating the air.
The disgusting smell goes well with my mood. I’m feeling down and miserable as I have been alone for several days and the future prospects are not all that good. It’s what happens when the one you love decides it’s time to move on. The moving on is part of nature I think, it’s the being left behind that gets to you.
So now I sit in this stink, wallowing in the mire of my own stink while out there someone parties and is having love thrown at them.
But like the tide things will swing back. There will be moments of hope and moments when the incoming tide will bring suggestions of renewal and rejuvenation.
So right now I stand and observe the receding tide, like my life the future is there but a long way off. Can I stand the wait for the tide of my life to turn itself around and flow back just for me or am I destined to flounder in the shoals of life, out of reach, stranded left to flop about with intention but never really achieving anything?
I wish I could be more positive but fate they say is a bastard when you think about the possibilities it potentially presents to you.
So I kick the sand once more, realise I’ve made a divot in the wet sand, turn on my heel and walk back into my past.