As we age, we have a lot of time to reflect on the past.
Behind us littered in our wake are the exploits of our earlier lives, some noteworthy but many cringeworthy to say the least.
It does become a matter of wishing you knew then what you know now. But those errors we made have all contributed to making us the people we are now.
It’s after it’s all over that you get to evaluate the many episodes in your life that have shaped the person you are now.
For many of us older folk, we look back at how naïve we were. I, for one, thought, like so many, that I had a handle on this life thing, but experience was to tell me I didn’t. I stumbled along, making mistakes, getting involved with the same sort of people and committing the same mistakes over and over.
I think I was a slow learner, despite my belief I was a level headed sort of bloke.
If I’d known back, then I was not going to be someone’s knight in shining armour things may have turned out differently. I would not have stepped into the mire of abuse and maybe have taken more control of my life. It took me twenty years to do that, and I have to admit it was a freeing decision.
There are some things I would not have changed, even though at the time I didn’t really know what I was getting myself into, like teaching, it seemed an ok place to go in life, but I had little to no idea what it might mean for me. That happened as I went along.
I think many of us are works in progress, we move forward, filled with trepidation, but believing we don’t want to stand still and stagnate. This happens all through life, and I’m sure in years to come I will think back on these present years and wonder what might have been different had I known better.
The trouble is the years are flying by.