Tale Weaver #203 – Making Sense of Nonsense. – Crasis’ Grass


The Daily Mindblower December 27th 2018.

Breaking News:

“Crasis Gasitus seen pictured at the scene of his great discovery.

Many thought it impossible.

Few believed he could pull it off.

Your task is to complete the news story.

A small but enthusiastic crowd mainly made up of family and friends gathered at the farm of Crasis Gasitus for the opening of his newest invention and discovery Non-watering, non-growing grass.

Crasis is an eccentric personality in the district who had dedicated his life to achieving the seemingly impossible. He had boasted for years about his plan to invent a grass that was permanent and would grow despite a lack of water and to a height you could control.

Finally, his discovery had come to fruition. He claimed it would change the lives of all who invested in growing his new grass. People’s lives would not now be taken up of a weekend with mowing and lawn maintenance instead they would have time to pursue the things they liked.

Crasis had invented a grass that could be controlled in height, he did so in a variety of grass types, and so there is variety in what you can grow.

Once planted you gave the seeded area a generous watering and never again would you need to water. The seeds would germinate, grow and depending on the variety you purchased grow to a pre-determined height, 3, 5, or 6 millimetres.

There were protests of course, and on the far side of his farm, you could see a group with banners protesting Crasis’ farm. Signs saying “Ban the Grass”, “Lawns should be shorn” and “Bring back the weed” where held aloft by members of the Lawn Mowers Guild, the Lovers of Grass Association and the Weed Lovers Union.

Crasis had made a concession to the protesters by developing a grass seed that contained the sorts of weeds found in most yards, but they too grew only to the specified height.

So with the official opening and the procession of the crowd over the grassed area, Crasis signed autographs and took orders.

It is thought that in time Crasis’ grass will be a feature in most people’s yards. Orders can be made on-line at Crasis’ Classy Grass.com, and he is offering an opening week special of the selected seed buy one get one free all for the modest price of $50,000. They will soon disappear at that price, so get in quick.

Another mind-blowing story from the people at the Daily Mindblower.

Next week we’ll be reporting a story from Duckdale farm where the farmer, Alphonse Sausage has invented a duck that has ‘up’ rather than ‘down’.


Written for: https://mindlovemiserysmenagerie.wordpress.com/2018/12/27/tale-weaver-202-making-sense-of-nonsense/

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9 Responses to Tale Weaver #203 – Making Sense of Nonsense. – Crasis’ Grass

  1. crimsonprose says:

    Um. I foretell the future here:
    Three months passed. Lawns sprouted. Grew. And halted. And every weekend the previously harassed gardening hubbies (I know, not PC) settled into their garden chairs to admire the results.
    But, alas, the nagging never stopped. Why did he sit there, weren’t there chores to be done?
    Another month and those aggrieved hubbies (I know, not PC) regretted the purchase. For where might they go now to escape ‘er indoors?
    🙂 🙂 🙂

  2. Lyn says:

    I can’t imagine why anyone wouldn’t love that grass. I’d sure love to have some in my little courtyard. I’m still trying to figure out what duck “up” looks like as opposed to duck “down.” How would that affect a duck’s waterproofing?

  3. Jules says:

    I think this is a perfect April Fools type of story. Very fishy indeed 🙂
    A fun read. Thanks for the prompt.

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