This week’s words: Crash Fraught Glance Fantods ((n.) a state of extreme nervousness or restlessness; the willies; the fidgets) Newsfeed Breastbone Humanity Hurl Occam’s Razor ((n.) the maxim that assumptions introduced to explain a thing must not be multiplied
beyond necessity.) Passivity Dead Downgrade
When consciousness arrived for Beryl and Frank Fantod, the thought they were dead never struck them until they saw Death standing nonchalantly to the side leaning against the gate their car had crashed into thus ending their lives. Death had long discovered there was something about him/her/it that created a sense of extreme nervousness in every soul he encountered. Beryl and Frank were no different once reality dawned on them.
They were fraught, to say the least despite Death’s appearance and doing his best to appear passive a mere glance in their direction set them into a fit of restlessness.
Death dealt with this all the time. There was no way he could downgrade their circumstances, it was plain and simple, death had arrived into their now non-lives and as he often explained to other entities when he had a rare moment of downtime it was a matter of accepting Occam’s Razor. The other entities would nod as if understanding this simple premise but wondering whom this Occam was and what did his razor have to do with it all. But like all entities they accepted everything Death said after all Death wasn’t the sort of entity one hurled any sort of insult at.
Meanwhile, the Fantods were standing there in their deceased state. With their humanity now a thing of the past Death always thought it prudent not to allow the deceased to see what happened to them in death, as it was Beryl’s breastbone had sustained considerable damage and Death didn’t think it would do anything for her present state to show her the damage she incurred.
So instead he tuned her mind to the newsfeed currently being broadcast through eternity about free-flowing streams and the song of birds, which served as a relaxing mechanism for all new arrivals.
It worked every time, the Fantods were able to put aside their natural instinct to fidget and worry and were happy to follow Death along a winding path littered with signs advertising all sorts of attractions in the garden of eternity.
“This might not be too bad after all,” said one to the other as they passed a sign saying ‘Day One Free Special Lecture’, “Making the Best of your Eternity”.