I recall my parents speaking one night, and as a natural born eaves-dropper, I listened especially closely when my name was mentioned. The word advanced was mentioned in reference to me, and I was curious as to what they thought I was advanced in. I certainly wasn’t intelligence as my father would often refer to me having the smarts of a nailed down plank. I knew it wasn’t in connection with my failed attempts to join the school sporting teams either, and as for dancing, it was known I had two left feet.
I was relieved to discover it wasn’t in relation to some insidious disease that might bring about a premature death.
No, the answer lay in the size of my feet. For a boy of my age the size of my feet was an issue for my mother especially as each year I went up two sizes and how big were they going to be by the time I stopped growing.
It was at moments like these I remembered the words of my grandad: “You’ve a firm grip on the earth with feet like that.”