Truth begins blurring
Words said the great divide
Circles of hate thrown randomly
The world fractures
Where to now
Messages back and forth
Deep meaningful affirmations
Hanging on every word
Smiles and tingles
My blows predicted
Cowering in a distant corner
What’s raining today isn’t wet
Get up be some sort of a man
Love pats is all
You were everything
Apple of my blue eyes
I called you my precious one
To your retreating back
My heart broken
Written for: http://dversepoets.com/2014/09/25/9490/
Poetry is definitely not one of my gifts. I do enjoy sharing other people’s gifts though. This one is great in content and form.
Thank you Lyn it was a good challenge.
I’m so glad I’m not a poet. I went and read the rules and it made my head ache. I like to stick with free form, I’m good at that. Anything restrictive and I just want to bend the rules lol. I’m not much of a rule follower. You did great Michael.
Thank you Jackie, it was a challenging challenge…
Well I enjoyed this. You definitely made it your own. Not exactly iambic but certainly shaped in diamonds and an affecting poem. That’s really what it’s all about, taking an idea and making it your own. Kudos.
Thank you Gay, the iambic bit was a struggle I know. The shape ruled my head. Thanks so much for your kind comment.
oh it’s sad when those fights choke the love that once was blossoming…good if there is some kind of awakening at some point…and maybe new hope
Thanks Claudia. There always has to be hope.
That retreating back at the end when it’s all loss is when your voice grow thin just like the form of your poem .. well done..
Thanks you so much Bjorn, appreciate your kind words.
I’m glad I didn’t tackle this, as Gaye said kudos. I enjoyed the shape and your tale. Sad, powerful especially your line.. What’s raining today isn’t wet.
Thank you Jenny appreciate your comment.
How sad for the ending to the love once blossoming ~ I admire the shift in emotions from despair to love to despair, shaped in diamonds ~ Good one Michael~
Thank you so much Grace, have a good weekend.
the truth blurs quicker with the more lies told…it becomes hard to hold onto what is real and what is not…and can definitely push away those you love. nicely written.
Thank you so much for your comment.
You certainly woke me up with this one like wake up wake up. They were never really there, so drift away. Pats are so weak. Well said! Kudos on the ending from me too. Never expect people to just shut down. Just walk away, unless they wake and be a man? Waning awesome end.
Thank you so much glad you were able to connect. Enjoy your weekend.
The ups and downs of love certainly fill the bill here for the prompt. I enjoyed reading this, and the shape is easy to read.
Thanks Kathy, so glad you did.