Poetics: Homophonic Translations

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Eating a candy mint tart

Is simply a feast without compare

A feast to set your heart on fire

Tampering with taste buds is tempting fate.

 

Do you have the stamina?

The skill to discern a fake

For wannabes can be found

In any Florentine bakehouse.

 

Accept no pesky substitutes

Your taste buds demand the genuine

Treat them, as they should.

Your guts will love you always.

 

Trust no tourist guide

No matter the gastronomic songs of praise

For they are on the bakers commission

Of tortes, pizzas and jam sponges.

 

Eating a candy mint tart

Is simply a feast without compare

A feast to set your heart on fire

Tampering with taste buds is tampering with fate.

 

Look see and taste for yourself

The aura of their beauty lingers

Your lips you’ll lick, a lot

So get yourself a half dozen.

 

Written for: http://dversepoets.com/2014/08/26/poetics-homophonic-translations/

I used Marina’s poem as it leapt out at me with the above translation.

 

Ne-om aminti cândva târziu
de-aceasta întâmplare simpla,
de-aceasta banca unde stam
tâmpla fierbinte lânga tâmpla.

De pe stamine de alun,
din plopii albi, se cerne jarul.
Orice-nceput se vrea fecund,
risipei se deda Florarul.

Polenul cade peste noi,
în preajma galbene troiene
alcatuieste-n aur fin.
Pe umeri cade-ne si-n gene.

Ne cade-n gura când vorbim,
si-n ochi, când nu gasim cuvântul.
Si nu stim ce pareri de rau
ne tulbura, piezis, avântul.

Ne-om aminti cândva târziu
de-aceasta întâmplare simpla,
de-aceasta banca unde stam
tâmpla fierbinte lânga tâmpla.

Visând, întrezarim prin doruri –
latente-n pulberi aurii –
paduri ce ar putea sa fie
si niciodatã nu vor fi.

 

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33 Responses to Poetics: Homophonic Translations

  1. I’m still smiling at ‘your guts will love you always’. Tricky piece to work on, you did well. Now I’m hungry 🙂

  2. Gabriella says:

    At last one poem I understand. 🙂 I was beginning to feel stupid.

  3. brian miller says:

    oh i accept no pesky substitutes…especially when it is dessert…ha…
    love the aura of them lingering on the lips as well…mmm…

  4. Grace says:

    I’ll take one please, smiles ~ Enjoyed this one Michael ~ Now I am feeling hungry ~

  5. Polly says:

    What minty candy fun 🙂

  6. loved this write, also very glad it’s time for dinner… hah…

    Accept no pesky substitutes

    Your taste buds demand the genuine

    Treat them, as they should.

    Your guts will love you always.

    this stanza is really nice, and speaks a great truth: take a risk, at the end of the day, you’ll be glad you did; your guts will indeed love you, always. That’s what I personally got from this 🙂

  7. margaret says:

    Sound to me like you have been there – this poem is cleverly translated – fun to compare it side by side. Can’t wait to see how close you are when the “big reveal’ is given.

  8. JackieP says:

    Now that was an interesting challenge. You probably did as well as anyone, if they didn’t cheat LOL
    I enjoyed it, it was fun.

  9. Glenn Buttkus says:

    This was a test of, a challenge of phonics, not literal translations. A number of folks chose the Romanian poem Marina provided. I found after matching the sound of Spanish words to their English cousins, I ended up with word list lines, that just need a little finesse to flesh them out.
    Like what you did. In photography one genre is “Food Porn”. Perhaps that is true with poetry too.

  10. Yes the mint tart we share.. But you massaged quite a lot of meaning into this. Quite a temptation to read your lines.

  11. MarinaSofia says:

    I knew I shouldn’t have read this before breakfast – you’ve made me very hungry! I like the consistency of the imagery throughout, how you managed to keep the baking and eating metaphor going.

  12. claudia says:

    hmmm…. think i should try and find a candy mint tart somewhere…. nicely done sir…

  13. mood wings says:

    My goodness, those look (and sound) delicious.

  14. RoSy says:

    Can’t wait to see the reveal…

  15. Snakypoet (Rosemary Nissen-Wade) says:

    Oh, what excellent advice, and what a lovely, tongue-in-cheek translation.

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